Some Kind of Wonderful with Paul McDonald and Britt Mooney
Paul McDonald and Britt Mooney discuss Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) starring Eric Stoltz, Mary Stuart Masterson and Leah Thompson. In this movie, every character is chasing some status that they hope will give them a sense of belonging. The lie they believe is that status is where they have value. But truth and trust go together, leading to the intimacy and belonging we are all searching for.
Join us as we discover God’s truth in this movie!
Quotes
There’s a sense of bettering yourself from an external standpoint, but not really from an internal perspective.
Status equals belonging.
The core of every story is conflict, and conflict happens when someone is living a lie. And in this story, the lie is that status is worth sacrificing for because it’s the status that has value.
Stories resolve when people start living according to what’s true.
Anxiety and loneliness are epidemic in our culture, rooted in a lack of valuing truth.
You can only find security in something that doesn’t change.
Living in truth brings people together.
“I would rather be with someone for the wrong reasons than alone for the right ones.”
The date wasn’t about Amanda, it was about making a statement about who he is.
When your sense of belonging, success, achievement, validation is external, you’re always going to be chasing and you’re never going to find it.
You can’t have trust without truth.
When bad things happen, tragic, hard things, we have to sit back and remind ourselves of the truth.
God thinks that you are some kind of wonderful.
We are God’s delight, God’s masterpiece, but we don’t believe it. We don’t trust it, we don’t trust His heart for us.
Truth leads to intimacy.
“This is my church. What people say about me here doesn’t matter.” Wouldn’t that be a good way to look at church?
Themes
Trust is the basis of any relationship. But you can’t trust things that aren’t the truth.
Misfits being who they are and not being afraid to step into their identity
All these different characters are going after some sort of status and sense of belonging. They ask what does belonging mean, and how can I achieve it?
When we compare ourselves to others, we will never feel like we’re good enough.
The most important thing to do is live in truth: it’s uncomfortable, and looks different.
Anxiety and loneliness come from believing lies or half-truths about ourselves
Living in truth unites people. Living in comparison and believing lies will divide us.
Obsession with status and achievement makes us lose sight of the people who matter.
Trust and truth go hand in hand. None of these characters are living in trust or truth until the end.
Keith’s pursuit wasn’t about who Amanda was, but how she looked and the status she would give him.
One of the best things we can do is to take a step back, and ask God what He thinks about us, who do You say we are.
We need God’s reminder, and we need to accept God’s message, about the love He has for us.
The earrings were a message saying, “You’re worth it.”
The discussion with his dad renewed their relationship, and he went back from being Clifford to being dad.
Truth leads to intimacy.
Relationships lead to greater opportunities than money can buy.
The things we love that might be “uncool” is what brings us together.
Eight truths that are revealed that lead to the movie’s resolution:
Keith’s not going to college (leads to reconciliation with his father).
Keith’s sister sees her brother as a hero after learning the truth about the “cool kids.”
Keith gathers friends from the conflict through the things they both love (comparing art), and those friends are better than money.
Amanda has value apart from her status, reputation, and appearance.
Amanda and Keith used each other.
Hardy is a manipulator and a coward.
Watts is willing to walk away for Keith’s happiness.
Watts and Keith love each other.
Conflict reveals the character.
We are afraid to share the truth because we fear rejection, but exposing fear brings us together.
Resources
The Movies that Made Us on Netflix
The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America’s Rich by Thomas J. Stanley and William D. Danko
“The outpouring of love and support I’ve received has made me realize I’m more than my accomplishments and gymnastics which I never truly believed before.” – Simone Biles
“Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping him with holy fear and awe.” – Hebrews 12:28
Questions
What jobs/roles do you try to avoid?
How do you perceive the other roles? If you work in a blue collar job, what do you think of the guys who work in the office? And if you have a white collar job, how do you look at the men who work in the trades?
How do you define success? Belonging? Value?
Where do you feel “not good enough?”
When was the last time you felt anxious? Alone? Not enough? Can you identify the message you were believing in those moments?
When have you said, “I’d rather be ________ for the wrong reasons than _______ for the right ones?” What is the part that feels terrifying, feels like death?
What frequent message do you listen to that doesn’t align with what God says? “Just a sinner?” “Worthless screw up?” “Loser?”
Have you ever asked God what He thought about you? If not, try it (and if you hear something that isn’t confirmed in the Bible, it’s not God you’re listening to). Start with the simple question, “God, do you love me?” Because you know the answer is yes.
How would you feel being Amanda on the date? The extravagant dinner, a portrait of you, having the amphitheater to yourself, and being given a beautiful gift. Could you accept it?
Do you believe that you are worth it?